Have been gardening lately. Not my garden, but it really doesn’t matter. The garden is always a place where I find peace. This morning I spent repotting a bed of trees and shrubs. I had to toss several to the compost. The weeds had overtaken the plant, killing it, sadly. But I saved a good many. I pulled out the weeds choking the main plant, gave them new pots, lots of water, fresh soil. In this new environment, the shrubs will hopefully grow strong and healthy once again.
Sometimes when I garden, I think about and explore my mental health. So many people I know suffer from serious mental health issues and despite the increase in resources and support, the number of mental health concerns the general populace experiences seems more prevalent than ever before.
Why?
I think many are suffering battle fatigue. Yes, there are far too many individuals who have serious and significant mental health issues. But behind a good many of these stands an army ready to do battle with a demon they do not own; a demon they cannot see, cannot hear, cannot feel, and for the most part, cannot understand. A monster conceived in the conflicted and confused consciousness of a loved one who is mentally unwell. The army – mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, husbands, wives, friends who are family – they march into no-man’s man, again and again, fearful that while they may indeed win the battle, the war rages on. They have fought this battle before, battled the shifting demon. They are scarred, broken, and maimed.
How much can the soldier take before he himself succumbs to battle fatigue?
Support is not sacrifice. But for far too many, this is what it becomes. When you are in danger of losing yourself in the battle, retreat. That is not cowardly; it is not unkind. It is strategic. You cannot save anyone if you are yourself swallowed by the demon.
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Twice-Loved 